If Only...

It's 3am and I can't sleep and I need to work in the morning.
WORK! I know. But don't get excited. It's just one day. Filling in at the Historical Society. Not a reoccurring gig. Sadly.

Moving on...

I can't sleep. And everytime I try to sleep I have mini panic attacks. I'm currently going through a tiny crisis (deep breath)... I am currently going through a tiny ... challenge and it is hurting my sleep cycle.

Anyways...

Since I have wireless internet now (yay!) I decided to browse the web at the wee hours of the a.m. I stumbled upon a blog that had a link to this video:

http://thechicktionary.com/post/118254199/will-houghteling-2009-ivy-oration-bull-markets

I believe it is a student speaker at this year's Harvard Commencement.
It's hilarious. So I suggest watching it all the way through.
But it hits home for me for two reasons:

1. I wish I had even been able to enjoy ANY commencement speaker. When I have complained about this in the past, someone always reminds me that there was A commencement speaker. But I don't remember this. And I am told it was the student body president.
Pfft.
I wish I had been able to enjoy a decently famous commencement speaker. Heck, I'd have been happy with the Governor. But nooooo.... NDSU, COME ON!

2. I wish I had something equivilant to the "H-Bomb". When I apply for a job my application is tossed in the pile along with the University of Nebraska - Lincoln applicants and the University of Minnesota - Twin City applicants. Yes, I'm calling YOU out. Just because you spent twice as much as I did at a school 4 times as large as mine doesn't get you in the "Cool School" pile. All the Midwestern state schools go in the same pile: THE GARBAGE CAN.
It made me jealous to listen to this D-Bag talk about his Harvard Crown. Unemployed and proud. Wheras me, well, I'm unemployed and still hopeful. That's a start.

Ivy League jealousy aside...

I have a hot job lead. It's exciting and I'm excited, but I am also stressed. I had no idea how complicated saying "yes" to a job might be. I always thought I'd fall prostrate on the floor in praise of any company who wanted me. And now the time has come and I'm biting my nails in anxiety.

I can't sleep because of this.

It is currently 3:10am.
I have to work at 10am.
This sucks.

Good Night.